The American Wrestling Federation's second PPV to date. No matches, just an all out brawl for the World championship. Every member of the entire roster will be fighting out to claim the gold. They must enter the Ladd School for the Mentally Challenged at the bptton and fight their way to the top of the building. Then they must exit from the roof and find away back to the gorund without killing themselves,
The Tour[]
[The scene opens inside of a small 1980's Ford Geo. We are in the passenger seat watching the scenery of Providence, Rhode Island. Home to such American landmarks as Florence Nightingale's Nurse Cap, The World's Largest Bug, and The Tree Root that ate Roger Willia... You know what, this is stupid. We all know that we're in a shitty last second rental car, sitting next to the Pro Wrestling Press' head writer and approaching the site of the most anticipated Pay Per View Wrestling Event since The Torment Pay Per View of 1980!!! ]
[Every man on the American Wrestling Federation roster will enter one house. One man will leave the very first AWF World Champion. Sounds simple? Well wait till you see this house. It's like no other. The Ladd School for the mentally challenged is a place with a deranged and sickening history of mysterious unknowns. ]
[Twenty five unexplained deaths, one-hundred twenty-seven unexplained mysterious injuries. And eighty-nine people have gone missing in and around the Ladd Scool since 1945. For those of you that couldn't be bothered to count, that's Two-hundred forty-one unexplained occurrences. Closed down and for unexplained reasons never torn down for over 40 years the building has stood in the middle of a dead field rumored to be incapable of growing anything but weeds.]
[The rusted blue Ford Geo pulls around a corner, which is really no corner at all, more a break between the chest high tangles of dense weeds gathered around the subject of this portion of the newsletter. The camera shows the Ladd school, deceivingly small on the outside, for a moment before panning to the left. The brakes hit and the Geo comes to a stop. The gear shift in the middle grinds into place before Reggie turns the key and pulls. It sticks! Reggie lets out a large moan before smashing his hand into the key.]
Regie: MOTHER F****ER!!!
[Reggie pulls his hand away from the ignition and waves it in the air... blood drips from the palm as he slips it back onto the key and rips it out of its home.]
Reggie: Lets get going bub, I bet he's here already!
Cameraman: I don't see anyone... there's a lot of construction equipment, but nothings moving.
Reggie: It can't be! He said 4:30 and it's coming up on Five now. I'm going to go look.
[ With that last part Reggie Crow looks up from his damaged hand to reveal and bandaged nose. He reaches for the door handle and pulls it right off the hinge. He tosses it in the back and rolls down the window. Opening the door from the outside he steps out.]
-5 Minutes Later-
Reggie: Where the hell could he be!? What if we had been here on time? I don't want to be in this spooky joint any longer than possible.
Cameraman: I totally agree.
[Suddenly you hear a tapping sound all around you. You can almost hear Reggie and the cameraman shit their pants as they spin around to show The Boss standing just outside the passenger window. The cameraman rolls down the window and Tommy Bishop Sticks his head in slightly. He is wearing an expensive pair of Oakley sunglasses and a sharp charcoal gray suit. His head shines in the late afternoon sun. His teeth show bright in the large grin on his face.]
TB: Hey there Reg.. Ouch!! What happened to that schnauze of yours?
Reggie: Just nevermind that, we've been here far too long already. Can we get to this?
TB: Sure, lets get inside.
[We follow Tommy up a long forgotten stone walk way that leads to the front door. The Door itself hangs slightly ajar to the jam it sets in, letting cracks of light through. Tommy Picks the door up by the handle and swings it inside of the building carefully..]
TB: First thing's first. You need to be careful... this first floor has a very unstable foundation. The Basement was closed up a good while ago and emergency services have refused to come out here until I safen up the place a bit. So watch your step guys.
Reggie: So you're telling me you're going to bring 20 plus wrestlers in here.. lock the doors, and let them go at it, with a floor that could give way into a basement with no way out?
TB: Do I really look like that much of an Ass**** to you Reggie? Tomorrow morning construction will begin, we will be installing 4 more front entrances and one more back entrance. We will be strengthening as much of this place as possible.
Reggie: You say you will be adding entrances, what for?
TB: Every wrestler on the AWF roster will enter through one of the 10 entrances around the building. Most will start here though... for some reason most of the entrances lead here... we still haven't been able to find the blueprint's so we're not sure why.
[Tommy walks smoothly and cleanly through the trashed entrance way. Doors stand open to your left and right showing the light outside. He makes his way across quickly with the camera and Reggie close behind. He pushes another door open and we are in a large auditorium.]
TB: 15 men have hung themselves here. Interesting isn't it? 15 different men, at different times, all with full, and pleasant lives have gone right up on that stage. It used to be grand. They've brought a ladder and a length of rope. Tied it off right on that crossbar up there and shook till the ladders fell... Let's move on.
Reggie: Are we going to get to a point any time soon boss?
[Bishop ignores him completely, stepping through a set of double doors he stops and turns around.]
TB: That door behind me, it leads to the dormitories the young men and women that stayed here slept in. You don't even want to know what happened there.
Reggie: What do you mea...
TB Let's move..
[Tommy continues on to a set of steps, as he walks up them he speaks, never turning to look at the reporter behind him.]
TB: This here was the strangest phenomenon... I was never actually able to find out how many people fell down these stairs, but its more than 40. according to one account, these were known as the stairs to heaven.. Interesting isn't it?
[As the words escape his mouth there is a loud crash. The top of Reggie Crow's head pops out of view.]
Reggie: AAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! SHIT!!! HELP ME!
TB: I got you, don't worry, just step up.. there you go.. I told you to be careful didn't I?
[Tommy continues up the steps to a second level. He shows Reggie from room to room winding in and out in a maze of halls and doors. For a while it seems as though he is only going in circles and then we come to another set of stares. This set leads up to a third level. We repeat the process once more to the attic. An enormous empty space. Above us is a roof riddled with holes. Below us a floor made of thin slats of wood ready to snap at any time. Tommy walks to the middle of the ring and spins around taking in the dingy condemned property.]
TB: This is where it really get's interesting though Reggie... this is the Attic. We will hang every weapon you could imagine, and more from this ceiling. We will hang a ladder from the roof above.
[Tommy walks across the room, leaning against a wall is an old beat up ladder. The boss picks it up and walks it back to the middle of the room. He sets it up and shakes it around for a second to check it's level. When it seems he's comfortable he looks at Reggie.]
TB: You ready for this Mr. Crow?
Reggie: Ready for what?
[Tommy springs up the ladder like a cat. Once at the top he reaches one arm up high, grabbing the torn and aged roof. He yanks up as the ladder falls from beneith him, swinging himself up through a hole and onto the top of the school. Reggie does his best to copy the boss. He fumbles around with the ladder, falling 3 times before finally making it to the top, Tommy reaches out a hand and pulls him to the roof. The camera man follows and eventually all three are on top of the world. Reggie seems shocked and appalled when he sees the sight around him.]
Reggie: What the hell is this Bishop!?
TB: I thought you were a wrestling reporter Crow? It's a steel cage.
Reggie: I know that, why is it here?
TB: This is the last stage of the single most inventive match in the history of wrestling. The first man to make it here...
[Tommy walks to the cage, he grabs on and begins to climb. He is soon at the top and over. As he climbs down the other side he raises his voice, as to be heard by Reggie and the boom mic on the camera.]
TB: ...and climb over this cage! Making it all the way...
[ Tommy turns and looks down. He is still two stories high, a jump from here would surely end in dismemberment. He turns back to Reggie before letting his feet step off onto air, and plummeting out of view. Crow screams as the camera shakes. Tommy Bishop is Dea...]
TB: NUMBNUTS!!!
[The camera pans around 180 degrees and moves across the roof slowly, watching for holes along the way. When he gets to the edge and the steel cage he pans down to show Tommy still clean, still wearing his Oakley's.]
TB: AS I WAS SAYING, THE FIRST TO MAKE IT ALL THE WAY TO THE GROUND OUTSIDE THE HOUSE WILL BE THE NEW AWF HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION.
Reggie: How are we supposed to get down!?!?!?
TB: Grow a pair!!!